Dealing with toxic people: Learn how to detect, face, and overcome the challenges they can bring into your life and relationships.
Before that, we ask you to open your mind and be free of prejudices and judgments, especially if you are hurting right now.
We know that it is very difficult to ask this of you, but it is so that you can learn about it and be able to free yourself from environments and relationships that are bad for you.
What we will see in this article
What are toxic people?
Toxic people are people who, due to their toxic behavior, end up making the whole environment around them very bad, oppressing the people in their relationship, and having negative and sometimes destructive conversations.
Types of toxic people
In a way, people in your life help shape you into the person you are today.
Therefore, you have to be careful with people of toxic behavior and not participate in these behaviors. Here are some examples of how toxic people act, or rather, who have toxic behavior.
Toxic people are Narcissists
A narcissistic person is one who sees beauty only in himself, who has interests only in his own image.
Toxic people always make mean comments
When toxic behavior reaches the people around you through negative comments about your image, your flaws, your voice, and even the way you dress or walk.
One mean comment can be the root of a long tree of frequent bad comments.
Toxic person only see the bad side
Negative thinking can come from experiences where something really didn’t work and all the premises are repeating themselves again, but it’s not always just because of that.
It could be that every vision is negative, that everything you think, speak and act is out of insecurity and fear, and in this way you are “negativizing” everything and everyone around you.
A toxic person always criticizes your work
Your work is always criticized by this person, no matter what you do. It can be due to a dislike, an internal job dispute, unaddressed jealousies, and even the simple fact that a leader feels that he cannot praise the employees because it would look like weakness on his part.
The toxic person is self-destructive
All this person does is implode and self-sabotage.
Her work is never good, she doesn’t deserve a promotion in her own eyes, she is always apologizing for everything, and she always feels rejected by everyone.
A toxic person is a controlling person
He is a person who has the habit of generating control over the lives of those around him. She has opinions about clothes, jobs, words, where she goes, and especially about the new friendships she acquires.
Your friends cannot have new friendships, this causes a strong counter-reaction in this person, suggesting that they stop these new friendships.
What are the characteristics of toxic person?
- You think you are always right
- She is too jealous
- Doesn’t know how to share friendships
- Nothing you do is good enough
- Tends to be an acid person
- Almost always resorts to debauchery
- What she has or does is always the best
Well, these are just a few toxic behaviors that we see, but they are critical to be detected quickly and combat them in the best way possible.
And understand, you will not fight a person, but simply not let this toxic behavior into your life.
You will also need to take a stand against this behavior, either by talking to the person about it, or if you don’t get positive feedback, try to distance yourself a little so that you don’t get entangled in these destructive issues.
Toxic person in the family
At times we will come across toxic people in the family, this is common, even because we may be producing some “garbage” without knowing what we are doing, right?
The most important thing is not to distance yourself from your family, but also not to get into this game and not to get contaminated by it.
Learning to listen more than talk is a fantastic tool, no matter how difficult it may be, believe me.
Toxic people at work
Most of the time we don’t choose our colleagues, and it is common to have to deal with toxic people at work, items that even we produce unwanted, due to the moment we are going through or even our personality that needs to be better worked on.
The toxic relationship may even have been generated by a company culture that is generating toxic behaviors at work.
How do toxic people act?
Usually toxic people act in an empathetic way at first, but gradually they begin to control the relationship and only what this person likes and is interested in becomes meaningful.
However, it is important to understand that these are people who have a fear of losing control, who are often insecure, and who need help, not fighting.
Let’s understand a little better about this.
PS. Don’t take this the wrong way, you can’t pass the “buck” for toxic behavior, just that it can be dealt with without major harm to you and the person, believe me.
Toxic people or toxic behavior?
Sometimes we think of toxic people’s behavior, buts you have to remember that it’s not people who are toxic, but rather, behaviors that come to be.
We strive for a respect that should, at the very least, be natural on the part of the other person and ourselves for others.
Currently, many people have also been feeling “liberated” by working Home Office and not having to face it, but it really needs to be faced.
Think that one day, maybe you will work with people around you again.
Imagine working 8 hours a day with people who behave the same way…. Think that maybe one day you will work with people from your environment again. Maybe this is your case, and it is terrible to know that you are going through this situation.
Characteristics of toxic behavior
- Toxic behavior at work changes the mood of the group.
- You feel that you are being manipulated into something you don’t want to do.
- You are constantly confused by the person’s behavior.
- You feel that you deserve an apology that never comes.
- You always have to defend yourself against this person.
- You never feel totally comfortable around them.
- You continually feel bad about yourself in their presence.
This is also a small definition on the subject.
What are the characteristics of toxic behavior?
The characteristics of a toxic behavior are all those that do harm to the environment and seek to control and be at the center of the focus of all situations, sometimes controlling everyone, sometimes making everyone penalize themselves for the events that occurred in order to get stuck with one person.
How to deal with toxic people?
Many times this causes us enormous stress, depression, and makes us look for other jobs, when in fact, everything could be different and solved in a simple way.
Dealing with toxic people’s behavior can be simpler than it seems, because it is still better to be on this side than on that side of this toxic expression.
Dealing with toxic behavior at work is also about striving for a better environment, better colleagues, and achieving a naturally productive relationship in your field.
You see, living with toxic behavior should not be accepted by any company and by anyone healthy, so let’s look at some clear ways how to combat this evil.
Relationships with toxic people
We need to remember that toxic people are never truly toxic, but some behaviors can be, so we should not judge people.
This first item may seem strange, but what we most need to understand is that repeating toxic behavior at work, such as hasty judgments, petty revenge, or rude rants, will only bring more problems for you and the environment.
Worse, it will give more reason for those with the toxic behavior to further intoxicate themselves and others.
Take care to build good bridges and not destroy them.
Build bridges rather than tear them down
This is perhaps the most important item when dealing with people of toxic behavior, because most of the time they don’t even notice how much harm they do to others.
In other cases, they have this behavior simply because they are self-destructive and need urgent help.
They are also difficult people to listen to, no doubt, but by building small bridges every day, you eventually get to the point where this behavior is revealed.
With this, you will be able to share together a gentle change, at least, to behaviors, and perhaps bring about a real healing for you, the environment, and this person.
Believe in the power of your relationship!
You must Self-Preserve
This is the starting point for anyone who needs to deal with toxic people.
It is not necessary for you to say what you had for lunch, what you did on the weekend, and other things in your life that belong only to you.
When a person is toxic, the first thing they do is contaminate the good things that belong to you, either by talking about you in a derogatory way and distorting facts.
Set boundaries for the toxic person
Setting limits, even on distance from tables, is sometimes necessary, because if something is bad for you, you need to step back a little so that you can also breathe and not live in a tense way for 8 hours a day.
Let’s look at some other important boundaries so that you don’t acquire toxic behaviors for your life.
Limit what you receive on your cell phone
The fact that you receive negative things on your cell phone can be enough for people with toxic behaviors to think that you also share their thoughts.
They can also give the wrong message that you agree with their actions, attitudes, images or videos that can be bad for your mind.
In addition, you will also be feeding yourself these bad things. Be clear, politely, and say that you would no longer like to receive such content on your cell phone.
Don’t receive gossip
Don’t get gossip about other people, even if you like it. The less we feed on gossip, the more respect we have in front of people.
In some cases people may even involve your name in questioning, so you have to be careful with these issues.
Don’t laugh at bad jokes
Even if they are funny, don’t laugh at the bad jokes that come to you, as this will make you participate and end up giving the message that you also like such jokes and may even do this to others.
Don’t read about other people’s lives
Try not to research other people’s lives on social networks, because this brings the habit and maybe even the addiction to know more about other people’s lives, which can give the false sense that we are in control of their lives and that we can have a say too.
Out of toxic groups
Similar to the previous items, some social networking and other groups can bring toxic behaviors to all of us, so leaving these groups turns out to be a great idea.
We may even be considered boring at times, but we will be respected for our firm stand on what is right.
Not to mention that this will help people open up to us more and that we will be a reference for everyone.
When your company looks for leadership, your name will be well considered for this position.
Leading by example is always the best form of leadership!
Don’t get into the mood for toxicity
I met a very sweet person in a company, however, as the months passed, she became an extremely bitter and critical person.
Well, after they fired a person who was bringing a lot of arguments and belligerence among the staff, who had become friends with this person, this person returned to her sweeter behavior, as expected.
Unfortunately, the rest of the team no longer looked kindly on her, as she had gotten into the mood for toxic behavior at work and it wasn’t long before she was fired as well.
As a result, she fell into depression and took a while to recover. So don’t get into that mood, because contamination can overwhelm you as well.
Do not be the one to share what is toxic
You must also understand that perhaps the toxic behavior can have you as its orgiem, without you realizing it.
This happens because you learned a distorted culture in your professional or family environment, whether it came from your leaders, colleagues or even brought from their parents.
You need to identify toxic behaviors in yourself, perhaps even with help from friends.
If you are producing and reproducing toxic behaviors, you need to stop quickly.
How do people perceive your behavior and attitudes?
Have you ever wondered how people perceive your behavior and attitudes?
Maybe even bad behavior on your part causes some people to move away from you or treat you in this very way.
So don’t lose control of what is right, and reflect on your attitudes.
This will only bring humility and make you a very nice person for everyone and understand, humility is not putting your head down for everything, on the contrary, it is knowing who you are and dealing very well with your limits and positions.
Combat toxic behavior
In talking about how to deal with people of toxic behavior at work, it is impossible not to warn you why, in addition to taking the above steps, you should maintain a contrary and positive behavior about the “garbage” you receive.
Don’t be combative with the same weapons of evil but with positive attitudes, without recriminating people, yet firmly.
This will remove from your life those who produce such behavior.
Don’t let yourself be flattered
Many people who have the toxic behavior, when they see that a person will not let themselves be bent, end up approaching this person with flattery and attempts to get closer.
Don’t fall into this temptation, because vanity is one of the biggest problems of the human being.
Know who you are and know how bad it makes you feel to be surrounded by people with this kind of behavior, so don’t bend.
Believe in what is right, for you will be much happier in your work.
Toxic people don’t exist, they allow themselves to be contaminated.
However, as a last truth (yes, we believe that a person is not toxic, but has toxic behaviors), understand something special and more human: people are not toxic, they allow themselves to be contaminated.
Your fight will never be against another human being, but only against the garbage they want to push on you, so love people, but hate the evil that contaminates their minds.
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